Darling and Sir

Written after the style of Robert Frost’s poem “Fire and Ice.

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Some say they like Darling

Some say Sir

Our Dear Sir is rather charming

And he loves his precious Darling

It is hoped that you will concur

You can’t have one without the other

To be a romance connoisseur

You’ll discover

Love grandeur

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By Darling ©2014 TSL

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Sir-ology

My Dear Expert Sir,

We spoke on the phone today, and you got on your soap box for a few moments. You were relentless in making sure I was doing things I needed to do i.e. healthy diet, exercise, get enough sleep, etc.

Now before you scoff, your questioning was very endearing and showed me that you truly cared. Now me being me, I made a smart ass comeback about you being a Sir-ologist in the art of Sir-ology. You laughed and remarked that you liked that title and subject area. You are a connoisseur in all things Sir-ness.

Now my Sir, if truth be known I am quite a proficient when it comes to the knowledge of you. I know you quite well love, and perhaps even a little bit better than you know yourself. So welcome to Darling-ville. Put your feet up, relax, and stay a while. I shall make you that cup of tea I do so well.

I love you very much.

Adoringly yours,

Dr. Darling

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Dear Agnes (We both know its not your name but if you insist on me writing this type of letter I could not think of a better bon mot)

I am somewhat surprised that you chose to mention your frustratingly obvious failings when it comes to looking after your own well being. It vexes me to no end when I hear you put yourself last and the repeated times it has happened. I will willingly ascend the soapbox yet again, and do so now to ensure you pay heed to my concerns and start looking after yourself.

We now know, after extensive testing of your allergies, the adverse impact some of the products you consume have had on your life. We now know that you need to transition these things out of your life as it’s the best possible treatment for your condition. But what do you do? Let me ask again. WHAT DO YOU DO? You tell me that you are too busy to deal with it right now and that you will put other life events before your own. Yet again.

Let me say here in a manner that brokers no confusion. I WILL NOT STAND FOR IT. If you think I am not a man of action I dare you to test me on this. My passport is ready and my wallet is willing. If you won’t allow me to look after you from here (you know I have told you to send me the literature I will read it and have shipped to you the things you need to start using). Then I will jump on a plane and do it in person. I even urge you to call my bluff because as you know my love I just don’t blink.

That being said I am more than happy to settle in Darlingville. I would love to try its tea shrine and sample its wares. As for putting up my feet and relaxing, well that will happen when you start looking after yourself instead of just talking about it.

Allergically Yours

Professor Sir With Love

©2014 Darling and Sir

Prune the Grapevine

My Dear Sir,

A friend of yours recently asked you if our ardor has waned due to our busy schedules. You informed me that you assured him that this wasn’t the case. I had to laugh. If nearly 15 years hasn’t diminished our love and affection for each other than busy works days aren’t even an issue.

I’ve told you once, and I will tell you again. I plan on being in your life forever. The only way I will cease to be a part of it is if you tell me to go away. That would break my heart, but I would honor your wish.

I love you Sir. I find my life to be better with you in it. I feel more complete.

Love forever,

Darling

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My Darling

I had hidden you away from not only the world but from the bright and shiny places in my mind. Never again.

You are front and centre in my life. Get used to it. It’s where you’re going to stay!

Busy schedule be damned. We will prevail.

And you can forget this talking about me telling you to go away. It’s not going to happen.

You found me again my Darling. You will not be rid of me so easily.

Clingingly Yours

From Sir With Love

©2014  Darling and Sir

Cate B

Dear Darling and Sir,

First of all, I hope you are both well. I want you to know that I enjoy reading your letters and am feeling quite privileged to be a part of your relationship. Thank you for sharing.

But I do have one question. When will you two get together permanently? It troubles my imaginative mind that your romantic relationship, with all the normal ups and downs that all couples go through, is separated by such a vast distance geographically.

This is not good. I realize the logistics can be challenging. Who will give up family and culture and jobs to make the big plunge? It troubles me. Have I become too involved? I am for you both. I am for the Darling and Sir to become a family in every sense of the word (Sirling or Darsir). Is it too soon to answer this for me? Must I wait for all the letters to be posted?

I have now asked five questions.I wait with anticipation to know the outcome of The Sir Letters.

Patiently (sort of) yours,

Cate B
(Lets have Another Piece of Pie)

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Dear Cate

Before I even begin to answer your question I must first say thank you for taking the plunge and joining us in this little diversion for The Sir Letters. It’s truly great that some of our regular commenters are now becoming guest correspondents.

That is the big question that you ask Cate. When will Darling and I get together permanently? Life has gotten in the way, and we don’t know at this point. 

But let’s speculate and assume that it were to happen. In terms of who would give up what? Well I would. At the risk of making this story any sadder than it needs to be, I have no parents, no siblings, no spouse and no children. The only commitments I have are friends and a job, breaking those ties would be relatively easy.

You most certainly have not become too involved. You are an active part of our little community and you are not the first to ask such a question, similar references are scattered throughout our comments. I am fatalist while Darling is an optimist. I believe I already know the answer though, if truth be told, our story quite literally is still unfolding. This story will come to an end, certainly the blog part of it. Our final letter may still be quite unsatisfying though, because we may not have an answer (either way) but the story of our love will be told and all that may be left is an empty hole, with our lost time together our testimony.

As for giving the two us one name (Brangelina anyone?) I am somewhat horrified and quietly flattered all in the same breath. I fear your anticipation may remain however, but thank you Cate for taking the time to write.

With Warmest Regards

Sir

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Hi Cate,

I agree with Sir in that you asked the difficult question.

Sir is correct in saying that I am an optimist. I do not believe that we found each other again by chance. I trust that most everything happens in life for a reason, but I don’t have answers yet.

I wasn’t even fully aware of what my feelings for Sir were when I first contacted him. I knew I cared. I knew I hurt. I knew that my genuine concern for his welfare overpowered my hurt. I know that he has dealt with the knowledge and feelings better than I have. Although I don’t voice it as often as I used to (to Sir), but this whole thing is still a head trip for me. I truly never thought I’d ever have contact with him again.

I’ll be honest here Cate, I deleted some of Sir’s response to you, because reading it physically hurt me.

And while I find Sir’s gallantry endearing in saying he’ll give up his world to come to me, that would most certainly not be set in stone. I prefer to think we’d be a dual-country couple.

What I can say with assuredness is that I love Sir, and my life is richer and fuller with him in it. I see Sir the way I have always seen him, and he is just beginning to understand that.

A big heartfelt thanks to you Cate for being our first correspondence. It is an honor to know you.

My best,

Darling

Knock Knock

My Dearest Amusing Sir,

I still remember your first joke to me. Well I thought it was a pick-up line, but we’ll call it a joke here.

Sir: You look like you have a little Aussie in you.

Darling: Umm no.

Sir: Well do you want some?

Then you laughed hysterically while I heard in my head “Ba-da-bing.”

Shockingly yours,

Darling

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My Bemused Darling

I cringe to see those words on the page, they appear so coarse. I can’t however deny them as the first time I visited your country (and long before I knew you) I used them to great affect.

I do have a penchant for shocking, I take a sly pleasure in moving people out of their comfort zone and watching them react.

I like to hide any pretense of refinement and learning and see what level of bigotry and poor behaviour is on offer.

I am sure I just said it to shock you.

My work here is done.

You Will Always be My Darling

From Sir With Love

©2014 Darling and Sir

The Unromantic Death of a Frog

 To Hear Sir Read This Post Please Click The Greeting

Play Symbol - Small

My City Slicking Darling

I have mentioned before and we have discussed at length your encounters with our native fauna. You have fed wallabies, frightened innocent little blue tongue lizards, and been petrified of spiders. Wait a minute. Did I just say petrified? Because the next animal of which I speak was exactly that.

We stayed at a little Bed & Breakfast in the Hunter Valley called “Hilltop Lodge.” I was recently nearby and saw signs entreating me to stay, so I can only assume it still operates. It was a nice home with a nice view. We checked in late in the afternoon, and when we had our room to ourselves you retired to the en suite. Upon entering our bathroom you shrieked and came running out. My immediate fear was that a snake had come up through the plumbing, something that occasionally happens here.

You were virtually speechless. I’m not sure I had seen you like this before. Eventually you alerted me to the beast within, and I steeled myself for the encounter to come. I entered with a little fear and trepidation to find a dead, dehydrated, petrified, it-ain’t-ever-going-to-breathe-again frog. I was about to deal with it, when you pulled me away. Your face was filled with worry and concern. I summoned the owners and they apologetically removed the offending carcass.

As a fitting coda you were attacked yet again. The sun had been down for many hours, and we were heading out to dine. We made for the car, but before we could embark a very much alive frog leapt out in front of you. He had back up. His mate was watching nearby. You shrieked and clung to me for protection. I laughed as sympathetically as I could manage. They were only seeking the sanctuary of the nearby pond my love. I don’t remember where we dined, but I remember your angst at having to cross the threshold that was the frogosphere before we could sleep. Suffice it to say we made it across safely and lived to tell another tale.

I will save you my Darling

Amphibiously Yours

From Sir With Love

Hill Top 1

Hill Top 2

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To Hear Darling Read This Post Please Click The Greeting

Play Symbol - Small    My Dearest Sir

I went in to take a shower, and all I saw was some dark thing in the bathroom with me. I didn’t stick around to see what it was. Your smirk is etched in my memory. I added heaps of amusement for you during our adventures. I was happy to oblige. I do feel awful how terrible the owners felt though.

If I hadn’t been with you nearly every waking hour, I would have suspected you of planting that dead frog just for the chance to be my hero again. You had already reached hero status with me, love.

I had forgotten about the live froggy assault outside. I’m beginning to wonder if there was some sort of cold-blooded, vertebrate conspiracy going on, and they were out for justice for their fallen comrade. The frog certainly died in the most unromantic way, and those neon-green buggers knew it. They blamed me. They knew I had dined on frog legs in the past – numerous times. They were figuring out a way to creep into our room at night, to pounce on my face, and stuff their webbed hands up my nose.

I knew it would be dark when we returned to the Bed & Breakfast, and the frog brigade would be lying in wait for me. You would have just laughed yourself to death, and where would that have left me? With a lifeless Australian and a lane full of dead amphibians after I beat them all senseless protecting myself because my “hero” died in the throes of a laughing spree. That just wouldn’t have been ideal.

I laughed when I saw the pictures of the Bed & Breakfast and the room we stayed in. I had forgotten how the towels on the foot of the bed looked like giant nipple pasties. The room has changed very little from the link you supplied; I guess we stayed in the Deluxe Room.

The owners were sweet, and they fixed us an awesome breakfast the next morning, so deceased animal carcasses and burlesque bed lingerie just added an element of excitement to the otherwise quaint atmosphere.

And if memory serves, you asked me to assume the frog position a time or two for a game of leap frog. Yeah that’s right – leap frog. Ribbit.

Croakingly yours,

Darling

©2014 Darling and Sir

I Hold a Candle For You Too

My Dear Sir,

For our 100th letter, I want to share another song that you play. I love knowing that you’re playing it. I love that it’s your beautiful hands working their magic over the keys.

Thank you for sharing yourself with me. I know you. I see you. I love you.

Love always,

Darling

Play Symbol - Small Sir Playing Elton John’s Candle In The Wind

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Hello My Darling

I love that you love me. I also love that you love that I play the piano.

Happy 100th. This was all your idea and so the credit must go to you.

I love you my precious Darling

From Sir With Love