You Don’t Write Me Emails Anymore

My Dear Sentimental Sir,

When we first connected again, you wrote me an email every night. They were tender, sweet emails. They were romantic emails. They were full of love and emotion. They touched my heart. I looked forward to them. They were the first thing I would look for when I woke up in the morning. You spoiled me, my love.

Now I know what you’re going to say. You exchanged those emails for letters on here. That makes sense in every way. It is completely impractical to expect you to type me emails every night and then write these letters as well. I am a realist.

I just want you to know that I loved your emails, and I did not take them for granted. I cherish every one. I have something in mind for those emails sweetheart.

Thank you my charming Sir – you twitterpate me so.

Yearningly yours,

Darling

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My Typographical Darling

You may have loved receiving my emails but surely not as much as I loved writing them. It had been almost fourteen years and six months since we had last set eyes on one another. There was much I had to say.

 Of course if truth be known our written correspondence was not just confined to email. We have a healthy record in Whatsapp, Tango and HipChat. We could comfortably fill volumes with those messages alone. 

Yes I think I am within my rights to say that you only receive infrequent typings due to my commitment to our story here. I should point out that when you revealed The Sir Letters to me you had quite a healthy head start. That had an immediate impact on my email habit as I had to catch up on close to 5,000 words just within this blog. 

I shudder in anticipation about your plans for my emails. I have an inkling of what you may have in mind. Keeping me very much on my toes you no doubt will.

You are not the only twitterpated one in this relationship my love. 

Correspondingly Yours

From Sir With Love

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©2014 Darling and Sir

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Guy Smiley

My Dear Smiling Sir,

When you smile, I melt. The world doesn’t know about your dimples. They do now. They are kiss magnets, as are the corners of your mouth. You never understood my fixation with the corners of your mouth. I really can’t say why, but it totally works for me. And don’t get me started on your bottom lip.

I’m feeling a swooning face plant coming on. Catch me.

Fascinatingly,

Darling

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My Dearest Darling

I adore it that you love my smile, my bottom lip and for that matter my dimples. Having said that you have no idea how uncomfortable it makes me feel to discuss these things. It’s not that I am particularly troubled by how I look, it is just most unusual for me to be discussing it with such candour.

Baby, if you face plant you know I will catch you. The weak part of me wants to cry out “well if my smile is such a kiss magnet get your pretty backside over here and do just that.”  Alas we know that won’t happen anytime soon.

You Will Always Be My Darling

From Sir With Love

P.S. I had no idea who Guy Smiley was before seeing your title. I had to Google his name. He looks like a dodgy second hand car salesman: light grey slacks, white shirt, red tie and blue blazer. I really hope it is just the smile you are comparing me too? Smiles.

©2013 Darling and Sir

Twitterpated

Dear Sir,

I accused you of being twitterpated, but you didn’t know what it meant. It made me giggle. You had to Google it. After finding out the definition, you agreed with me, of course.

You really need to educate yourself on the latest love lingo, but my dear Sir I seriously have a soft spot for you.

Twitterpatingly,

Darling

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Dear Darling

I feel nothing but sweetness and light when I hear you accuse me of being twitterpated. It does however gall me to no end that I did indeed have to Google it. As for the latest lingo of love? My love is stuck in a time vortex and I am constantly in early 1999. Therefore I have little need for such contemporary verbosities.

While I agree, endorse and adore the sentiment as a word, it still sounds like someone who is constipated in 140 characters or less!

Yours Most Amorously

From Sir With Love

©2013 Darling and Sir